Have a practice.

Take time out each and every day to sit in the cave of your interior and wait and watch. This is where the dragons are and this is where the gold is.

It is the cave of the unknown and that is the place of fear. It takes courage to enter and to face whatever comes. You will wrestle your demons here and gardens of bliss will grow here.

And just by turning up you call forth whatever dwells in the unseen, dark places of your being. You are the hero venturing forth with courage and awareness. You light the torch in the dark places, you illuminate that which is unformed and inarticulate.

You are the Light Bringer.

This is my cave. I come here alone. I leave the safety and comfort of the tribe and I sit in solitude, in waiting. I cannot know what will come so I cannot prepare. But I know that I am, I exist. And I have slayed dragons before, and I have gathered gold and flowers.

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I am the cave and I am the light. And I am the dragon and the flowers. I am the spilled blood of demons and virgins. I am the temple bell and the sleepless night. I am the dream of hunger, the wolf-whistle and the kindness of strangers.

I am the dragon and I am awake. The gold is mine. Courage or not, you will die. If not by my hand then by the ravages of time. Is it truly gold that you seek, hero? Or is it the end of death?

I am the cave. Timeless. So many heroes, so many dragons, so much gold and blood. My walls and floor hold no stains, but I remember all.

I am the gold and the virgin and the light of life. I am the object of desire and greed. I will not fulfill. I am what I am. I remain in my immutable nature, I adorn the world and all the beings in it. Yet I remain untouched and unmixed. I do not decay or waste away. I am ever resplendent, bright as the sun at noon. Behold, here I am, the object of your aspiration and surrender.

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We don’t want the gold, we want to be the gold. We don’t want love, we want to be love. We don’t want to be free, we want to be freedom.

Unity means free of boundaries, devoid of separation. Yoga is not to unite but to be unity. Nonduality is the state of nonseparation.

We are freedom, not free.

Love not loved.

Truth not true.

Peace not peaceful.

Life is the cave of dragons. Each day, each moment we must stand and face what comes. Armed only with our nature and our wits and the light of truth and courage..

I’ve been slaying dragons for so long now, but they keep coming back. These damn hydra. Sisyphus I am. I don’t need the gold. What do I need the gold for anyway? I need sleep more than I need gold.

Fighting is for heroes, I’m no hero.

I fight not for me but for others. There’s nothing in it for me. But since I must fight, I fight for them. Even though they despise me and reject me, I speak my truth because I must.

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Is there a better way to be?

Than what?

Than striving, controlling, wanting, needing, being someone, something..

Is letting go, stopping, dropping the chase, surrendering and accepting what-is.. is shedding the burden of being and doing a better way, a more peaceful way, a fuller way?

If I drop my sword and allow myself to be devoured by the dragon, what then?

If my bones become food for the plants and birds, what then?

Can we give up the struggle and see what comes, what remains?

When we’re tired of holding on can we just let go and see what happens?

Do we trust enough? Do we care too much? Fear too much?

Do we lack the courage to release our grasp?

Do we even know what would happen if we did?

Do we fear to find out?

Do we dare?

Let go?

So we freefall into oblivion, forever. So what?

Enjoy the fall. There’s an adventure for the fainthearted!

It’s happening anyway. It is what is. We just don’t care to admit it. We’re just really, really tense about our not-knowing.

We are freefalling, there are no fixed points. Endless openness in all directions. Freedom is exhilarating, no?

Breathe in, breathe out, repeat if necessary.

Breathe through the fear, because this is how it is and you’re stuck with it. Might as well get used to it. No point denying the truth, it has a way of insisting itself.

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In the cave of dragons, the voice of the father echoes out words of reproval. I thank him for his wisdom and go my own way.

My heart is filled with fear and love, but I am free.

Softly I begin to sing, words of goodness and kindness, words of joy and ease and peace. Words of love and essence. The melody is the fabric of Being, it is the Song of Life.

Behold the kindness of life.

 

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